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Increase your Credibility
Appear More Professional
and become trooley awesome!
To be taken with a grain of salt, and a dash of vitriol.
NUMBER 1: stop pilfering other people's works for “inspiration”, because they are so awesome, then announcing to all and sundry that you wish to conspire with other equally imaginative creatives to blatantly copy them, or at least make an awesome derivative work from them, while of course clearing yourself of all the blame by adding the useless disclaimer: “No copyright violation intended.”
Far from using these as inspiration to learn from you will simply be compounding the poor technique and mistakes of the 20 or 30 generations of the awesome brain dead copyright violators since the original image was made, to reach the depth of awesomeness that you have found in the bowels of the Internet.
NUMBER 2: look at some good photography and study good photographers. There are hundreds both from the past and present, and even if all you do is look at the work of
Ansel Adams you will still be streets ahead of all the armchair experts who drop the only name they know all over Internet forms.
NUMBER 3: learn about lighting techniques and when and why they are used. A good starting point for portrait photographers are
Beauty, Rembrandt, Butterfly, and Loop lighting, although there is a technique coming to prominence called “cheap skank ” lighting which in any of its many variations is guaranteed to affect even the most flawlessly attractive model.
NUMBER 4: study just some of the many more useful elements of composition and open your mind far enough to realise that you will not make your image instantly awesome by superimposing an imaginary tick tack toe gird across it.
NUMBER 5: refrain from trying to make that hugely oversized, ugly, designed-it-yourself logo an essential design element of your image. Better still throw it away completely and use the tried and tested, conventional copyright cut line as a watermark.
NUMBER 6: limit the application of the “Reduce to Mud” Photoshop plug-in to a maximum of three times per image. No don’t Google for it: just
learn how to process properly!
NUMBER 7: search out one or two models whose beauty, personality, charisma, self respect and pride in their appearance actually make it worth taking your lens cap off for, rather than any person you come across in your desperation. If a model herself is deluded about her ability or her prospects surely it is the photographer’s professional responsibility to tell her she has not presented acceptably or is possibly not even model material.
Be aware that
“Snog, Marry, Avoid” is a satire, not a training film about what to look for in a potential model.
NUMBER 8: pay attention to details: garish, inappropriate makeup; ugly,broken or bitten nails; worn or chipped nail polish; badly fitting clothes; unclean hair; awkward posing; unrelated, badly framed or poorly chosen background; skewed horizons; bony feet in “Minnie Mouse” shoes, etc.
NUMBER 9: show it little professionalism, and a serious approach to your work rather than hoping for the best from a Neanderthal Facebook grunt: “Wanna shoot…make woman look awesome”
NUMBER 10: have some kind of useful concept which some imagination can be applied to, and/or a viable useful purpose for the resulting images in your mind before the shoot. If the best you can come up with is
a ) my Facebook friends will tell me it is awesome and I could be a professional.
b) it will be awesome for your folio.
c) it will be awesome exposure.
Then the iconic phrase from the movie “The Castle” springs to mind:
“Tell’im he’s dreamin”
d) “possible magazine submission – no pay” is also a notorious laughter maker these days too.
BONUS NUMBER 10: and possibly the best solution for so many: sell all your photo gear and take up stamp collecting, at least you will then be exposed to some well designed, and maybe even some truly awesome images.
